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Friday, May 24, 2013
08.09.11

Entry 12 - March 17, 2008

“It’s like I go in and out of these moods.  I don’t like being alone.  It doesn’t help me.  Just makes me think about it more which I’m trying not to do.  But I don’t want to talk about it with my friends either.  They all have their own things to deal with and I don’t want to put this on them either.  Besides, I don’t want them to think that I’m crazy, because I know I think I am sometimes too.  It’s just easier not to discuss it.

They already started to “monitor” how much I drink and joke about interventions.  I don’t need anything else.  It’s just a rocky road right now that I’m stumbling along.  It’s like trying to walk this road while wearing five-inch stilettos!  It just isn’t happening!

I can’t wait til its years from now and I’m finally past it all and am able to look back and feel ok.  I just wish I could get some closure from this.”